(THE STORY SO FAR)
Once there was a midget called Stump My Growth, and she often drank Kentucky whiskey at Griffin's Crabs&Wings with Johnny2 Shoes. One gloomy afternoon, sitting all alone, she struck oil and began drinking it all day long until she finally remembered that she had an appointment with a mercenary group. Her belly bursted with such rage that her dragon burped and singed Amon Amarth, Rammstein. Then the sky broke and flooded to her dismay. Everyone around her, except her dragon, stepped on people. She then realized oil was bad, and very crude, and very flammable, and very costly. Johnny2 Shoes came out from Alfheimr with his army of fluffy bunnies to take over the whole world. With his whole fluffy bunny army he went forth conquering them all untill he got to a great wall. The bunnies jumped oh so high, but couldn't get over no matter how they'd try, so they ate Spinach and drank as Trump laughed and Hillary cried. While drinking whiskey flavoured strong coffee, 100-year old coke and chewing gum.
There off in the far distance a new power arose. They called themselves 'They Tyler Durdens of Red Kittens (T-DORKs).' The T-DORKs traveled across Imperial Japan looking for eggs in rice fields when they encountered Sengoku Samurai warriors drunk on sake, playing Pokemon GO. A Samurai said, "look, a Pikachu!" Then it disappeared into the van to get more intimate with the woman in black. Breathless she said, "that's so small pokeballs for Pikachu.," "...Don't do that" she sighed loudly. She tried to hold the Pikachu. Suddenly there came the tax collector to collect on the life insurance. They were shocked. "Pay up, or. . .eat my 9mm," said the collector.